While 2020 brought challenges and unprecedented times, it was was not “the worst year” for our family.
We each have our own journey. For us, 2019 became the year that held the toughest, worst, and best moments of our lives after losing our firstborn, 3 NICU stays, bringing our second son home, and all of the events in between.
Child loss and trauma have painted us a much different view on life. Each day is filled with a mix of joy and grief and each day we learn to appreciate the moments.
In 2020,
I cherished the little and big moments.
I cherished every hug and every sloppy kiss from our miracle second son.
I cherished every moment someone talked about or did something to honor our son in heaven.
I cherished spending quality time with my boys.
I cherished figuring out how to be a parent to a child on earth while holding space for our child in our hearts.
I cherished the moments of joy, even when it came with grief.
I cherished our new “quarantine style” adventures like hanging outside with a small group, camping, and even an intimate holiday season.
I cherished creating our own family traditions.
I cherished our health.
I cherished our second son’s cry because that meant life.
I cherished my husband and I growing closer every day.
I cherished every small moment.
I cherished all of these moments and so much more because we were lucky enough to have them.
As I move into 2021, I will continue to honor Carter and move forward with him each day, and I will continue to celebrate Aron.
As the NICU and loss communities move into a New Year together, I know some are looking forward to a New Year, I know some have mixed emotions, and I know some do not like the thought of a New Year.
No matter where you are in your journey, you are not alone.
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